I've always hated conflict. Confrontation scares me. So the idea of approaching someone who is confrontational in order to manage a conflict straight up freaks me out. But that is what I have to do tomorrow: I have to confront a fellow manager in order to successfully manage a particularly difficult conflict. Oy.
It would be so much easier to "get it off of my chest" by complaining to fellow employees, managers, etc. But the Bible clearly states that if we have grievances against each other, we must approach each other in love to try and resolve the issue. The only problem is that this is SUCH a scary thing for me. I think that this is because growing up, confrontation and conflict resolution always happened in a very heated, defensive manner.
Now I'm not saying that it's not good to seek counsel, because wise counsel can be a good, good thing! The line gets crossed, though, when we move from truly seeking counsel to gossiping about an issue. The line there is so thin, the shift is so subtle, but the change in heart is so obvious. It is when we move from desiring to solve an issue in love to condemning out of self-righteousness. And self-righteousness, condemnation, and gossip are three dark, twisty things that I have been DESPERATELY trying to root out of my life.
So I have to face my fear. I have to confront the conflict, head-on. In love. Being as wise as a serpent and as gentle as a dove. It's a delicate dance between kindness and cunning that's terribly tricky, but I'm going to try. Because I know that if I don't, I'll wish I had. And I know that if I do, my efforts will be blessed.
