Now, I don't mean to say that I can't handle the odd expletive tossed in a conversation in the heat of the moment. I can, and a lot of my friends do. But when someone systematically curses about me, my thoughts, my actions, or at me, I just shut down. At that point, I can't even HEAR the person because the cursing is so painful for me to hear.
I have a friend who chooses to curse. I have handled it just fine over the past two years that I've known this person. But he never cursed regarding ME until just recently, and when I asked him not to, he blew a gasket.
"I will not be censored," he said, as if I were trying to strip him of his right to free expression. That's fine. Express yourself all you want, but don't expect me to listen when the object of your curse words are me, my thoughts, and my actions.
Why is cursing so important to some people? Have I seriously just lost a friend because the right to curse is more important than a friendship of two years? And more disturbing to me is this: Have I been so blind as to not see this person's true colors these past two years? Have I really not seen the part of him that finds it acceptable to repeatedly hurt a friend by using language that is offensive and cutting? What does that say about ME?
I will say one thing: I'm going to be much more careful now about the people I share with, the people I let into the deep parts of my life. Because finding out that the person who you thought was your friend is actually capable of scrapping an entire friendship because he values cursing over you is almost too much to handle.
